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Tips on choosing the right
person from the Dating Scene
Okay, so you date people hoping that one of
these days you will come across the right
person, the one you will make the greatest
romantic connection with. But does it feel
like you are going nowhere and believe that
you just have no luck with meeting the right
people? Feel like you are lost and doomed in
this whole dating business? Stop feeling
sorry for yourself!
The reality of this situation is that luck
has nothing to do with it. If you are like
many people, you are probably dating
blindfolded, without even realizing that you
are doing so. If you feel unsuccessful and
dissatisfied with your dating patterns, then
it is time for you to take a few steps back
to see where things went wrong for you.
Think you have been doing everything right?
Think again! If you look back, you will be
surprised to learn that you got so caught up
in just the whole dating experience, that
you forgot what to look out for and
neglected your true needs and desires. What
are you really looking for in a lover? What
are your needs and desires? What qualities
are important for a person to have and what
other qualities are you willing to
compromise with and accept?
Getting back in touch with what you are
really looking for will help prevent you
from staying in the dating scene forever. It
is essential that you observe your actions
and decisions, making sure that you do not
continue to date certain people in the name
of dating. If you find that you are not
sharing the connection you crave with a
person, then you must discontinue with
dating that person. Sure, you will feel bad
for hurting that persons feelings, but what
you must remember is that there is nothing
too personal or emotional between the two of
you anyway, so just throw that excuse out-
and just break it off, in a polite manner of
course! This is where so many get stuck,
mistaking casual trial dates, with a
personal and emotional relationship. This
may sound too business-like for your taste,
but this is the way it goes in the real
world of dating. If you spend your time
trying to spare people hurt or
disappointment, then you have been doing it
all wrong. This does not mean that you have
to be harsh and rude, but it does mean that
you have to make finding the right person a
first and high priority for, not worrying
about what other people with think of you.
Which moves us to the next essential point
in dating. While it is normal that you fix
yourself up to make a great impression on
your date, it is not the most important
thing that you should focus on. In fact, so
many dating singles out there worry so much
about what their date will think, that they
totally forgot the purpose of the date- to
find out whether or not they will find the
connection they are seeking. No matter how
you fix yourself and what manners or
personality you put on, you will never be in
control of what your date will think or feel
about the date, so set that unnecessary
stress aside. Instead, shift your focus
about what you will think about him or her.
Observe everything about them. Do YOU like
their appearance? Does their personality
appeal to YOU? Do YOU feel that you are
making a good connection? As you can see, it
is what you think that is important here,
because you are the one looking for the
right person, as well as certain qualities.
Leave what they think, up to them!
The fear of being single forever can cloud
your good judgment, causing you to continue
seeing a person who you know you are not
entirely satisfied with. You will do this
because you will try to convince yourself
that maybe you have been too picky and being
with anybody, even if you are not crazy
about him or her, is better than nobody.
Stop lying to yourself! You do not have to
get stuck with someone you are not entirely
happy with, nor do you have to be single
forever. Being honest and up front from the
beginning is what will get you where you
want to be and whom you want to be with. Do
not worry that you may scare off someone by
telling him or her exactly what expectations
you have and how serious of a relationship
you are looking for. Look at this way, if
they get scared that quickly, then it is a
sign that they were not looking for the same
thing as you are, so it saves you time and
you can then move on to dating someone else.
As long as you get real with yourself, stop
making excuses, know what your really want,
stick to it and make it clear to the people
that you date, then you will be safe from
too many mixed messages, misunderstandings
and frustrations. When you treat your goal
of meeting the right person seriously and
important, then you will stay motivated to
find him or her, and when you do- you will
finally be able to begin the kind of
relationship that you have always longed
for, needed and deserve.
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